Every now and then you hear yourself, as if you are watching from the corner.
Sometimes it’s just the nature of having a toddler around. Things like, “get your hands out of the rubbish bin”, just roll off the tongue. As does “don’t strangle the cat”.
And then there are other things, that you really just hate coming out of your own mouth.
“I’m too busy, baby.”
“I’ve got to do some work, but you can play outside if you want.”
“I just have to finish this.”
“I’ve got to get this done.”
All things that are necessary when squeezing in work from home. But I don’t like it any better, no matter what the reason is. And even now that I’ve only got two months of work until I finish up for good, I still can’t rationalise it into being a good thing. It feels like putting life on hold until I can unchain myself from the computer.
The price I pay for being against childcare, I suppose. And although she’s getting closer to an age where I’ll be considering preschool and much more comfortable with childcare for half-days and things like that, I know that right now, she’s nowhere near ready.
So I’ll have to just hate my own words for a little while longer.
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My name is Zoey. 






























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