The silly season is almost upon us and we are going to three weddings in the next two months. All friends that I grew up with, now getting married. I think these will probably be the last weddings I go to for awhile, unless my brother decides to tie the knot, because know most people I know aren’t single. I feel old.
Not really. But kind of. (Isn’t that eloquent? You’re welcome.)
I was talking to a friend of mine about joint finances today. I would never have even considered joint finances before I got married. I liked the freedom to make my own mistakes and not worry about how it impacted someone else and also to not have to worry about keeping tabs on someone else’s spending.
But eventually something happens that make joint finances somewhat inevitable, like haivng children, or even a shared mortgage. Unless you plan on going back to work almost immediately after having a baby it becomes slightly ridiculous not to combine finances. It doesn’t mean it doesn’t lead to some rather sticky situations along the way. Like, does a birthday present lose some of its lustre when it’s being paid for out of joint money? And, given that I do all of our budgets/finances I have the task of money gatekeeper even though I’m not the primary earner (AWKWARD).
Confession. I (who was previously a big advocate of separate finances) don’t actually even have a bank account anymore. I am authorised to access a bank account. But it’s not in my name so if anyone writes me a cheque (very rare) I have to sign it over to the husband. Past me would be disgusted by present me. But here’s the thing we save money, pay less fees and rather than trying to pay one set of bills with two different accounts – everything is in the one place. I don’t think past me would buy it. But present me kind of thinks that past me has her head in the sand. After all, marriage is all about trust irrespective of what ifs. And combining money is just putting your money where your mouth is.
It all seems pretty semantic given that all available funds get spent on toys and cute toddler outfits anyway.
My name is Zoey. 
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