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That’s what Riley says everytime I take a photo now. I blame Diego and his camera. Or I blame me for letting her watch too much Diego. Either of those things.

This week between hearing about people separating their private and business lives on facebook and reading about this on Dooce, I’ve been thinking more and more about the photos I take of Riley and when the time will come when she wants more privacy or is too embarrassed to have it in the public sphere anymore. I know that’s something that is not for quite a while, but still I sometimes wonder what Riley will think about the whole thing when she is older. I’m not sure if it will be positive or negative.

I guess it’s hard to think about it because it would be impossible for me (at this point in time) to talk about my life without talking about hers. I don’t know if that will change as she gets older, but I assume it probably will.

If nothing else, I think it’s very important to control my own content, so when that day comes it can all be erased completely, if need be.

Where do you draw the line in the sand for what photos or stories you share about your children? At what age did they start to become embarrassed by it?

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http://www.dardoandme.com Jasmine

One of the main reasons it took me so long to set up my own blog was that I wasn’t sure how comfortable I was having photos of my son (and myself) online. I have plenty of images on facebook, but the privacy settings are very tight.

I think it has only as I’ve seen so many other women doing it that I’ve become comfortable with the idea. Although it only took a few days of me constantly taking photos of him for him to start running away from me and saying ‘no photos, Mama!’.

I won’t ever share any stories that would paint him in a bad/embarrassing light – I got way too much of that from my father when I was growing up, and to this day I maintain that should I ever get married, he won’t be permitted to do any speeches because he simply has no concept of in/appropriateness.

And nude photos. I don’t personally have a problem with my son and nudity, and sure, we have plenty of nudey photos in the albums at home. But I won’t post them online because you just hear too much crap about where nude photos of children can end up.

http://goodgoog.com Zoey @ Good Goog

I felt a lot more comfortable about the photo side of things once I did some research about the risks associated with it which are thankfully almost nil.

http://marfmom.com MarfMom

I use a pseudonym for my son, and I don’t use my last name on my blog. The nature of what I blog about, being a mother with a rare connective tissue disorder, means that a lot of people do know who I am or can easily figure out my identity. But, I feel like I owe it to my son (and soon to be 2nd son) to take at least some steps to protect his privacy. I talk about his autism diagnosis and use some pictures, but I don’t share stories/pictures that I think would someday embarrass him and most of the talk about his diagnosis is in terms of how it affects me, unless I am celebrating a milestone he’s reached. I wrote about this awhile ago: http://marfmom.com/archives/1738

I don’t know if it’s a perfect line. I think time will tell. And in every generation there is a way for parents to embarrass their kids, so I suppose blogs are what we’ve got.

http://goodgoog.com Zoey @ Good Goog

Very true. I was always embarrassed about something.

http://www.taniamccartney.blogspot.com Tania McCartney

Both my kids have had their photos and stories shared publically since they were very young (such is the life of an ex-family matters columnist and a mum who constantly needs models) so I think they’re pretty much used to the limelight now. And being an avid amateur photographer, they both quickly ‘strike a pose’ whenever I click.

I have always kept really personal stuff about them out of both magazines and blogs, though – I think there is a line and I am always thinking about how they would feel at 15 if they looked back on what I write. I guess that delineates the line for me.

Your little Riley is munchkin cute.

http://goodgoog.com Zoey @ Good Goog

Thanks Tania! Riley says ‘cheers’ whenever I take a photo. I think she means ‘cheese’.

http://www.unlikelymama.net Amber

I think, that when our children (the children of this particular generation) grow up it will be the norm to have lived out your life online…through your parents’ eyes. There will be school yard jokes about whose baby video went viral faster. It will be odd if you don’t have a million hits on Flickr.

In all seriousness, I think our kids will be fine with it because it’s all they’ve ever known. If you do decide to sensor yourself once Riley gets old enough to show concern, well at least you were able to keep an amazing log of her babyhood. That’s not something most of our parents could ever say!

http://goodgoog.com Zoey @ Good Goog

I hadn’t really thought about it like that but I’m sure you’re right way too many people with blogs for it not to be the norm

http://disydoit.wordpress.com disydoit

I am sure Riley will want you to stop once she starts her own blog
I am struggling so much with WHO i want to be. My facebook is littered by every extended family member, work colleagues which makes me hold back. I have been dipping my toe in twitter but plan to not link back to my real name and currently only have a couple of followers I know in person. Will have to read your link and see if it provides me some advice. Cheers

http://goodgoog.com Zoey @ Good Goog

Yes she’ll probably have one sooner rather than later, today she was taking photos on my phone.

http://www.digitalwoe.com/go/comments/ Lynda

I was just thinking about this earlier today. I think once they’re old enough to ask for privacy, I’ll give it to them. There are times now when Elias doesn’t want his picture taken. He’s seen my site – it’s not like I’m hiding it from the kids. I know he doesn’t fully understand what it is, but he knows I can pull it up on any laptop.

As far as stories I tell, it gets harder and harder. I’ve noticed in the past few months I’ve blogged a lot less about the kids, the more public I’m getting the blog. I shy away from stories that might embarrass them (too much) when they’re older and if possible, I let the photos take the lead and fill in the details.
http://multiplemama.com Andrea

I wonder about this too sometimes. But it reminds me of a time when I asked my mom to drop me off a few houses away from school. And when she asked me why I said, “Because it’s embarassing.” (which I don’t seem to be able to spell)
When she told me that made her feel bad I just looked at her in astonishment. Because I thought all parents knew teens felt that way. And all teens were expected to feel that way. I think it just happens naturally on it’s own to some degree.
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